Love, Life, and Healing; Learning as I Live.
With everything I have experienced in life, from childhood to adulthood---the good, the bad, and the unpredictable, there has always seemed to be a slight open window of optimism and the impeding idea that things could get better and would eventually get better, and my life story would finally triumph in the way I always envisioned it from childhood until now as an adult. I truly always believed that one day all of my past disappointments and failures would be validated and in the words of Whitney Houston, I would experience “My One Moment in Time”. Whether it was being recognized as a talented singer, having a successful career, marrying the love of my life or all of the above, I would one day be able to proudly embrace my Happily Ever After.
However, it was at the moment when looking back on one of the sweetest memories of my life, being engaged to who I thought at the time was my soulmate, instantly became one of the saddest memories of my life, (because time revealed he betrayed me, he wasn’t my soulmate and we didn’t get married). It was at that moment I realized life isn’t really fair and that “My One Moment in Time” was taken back and I may not get a “Happily Ever After” how or when I expected it to happen.
But it is amazing how when we feel discouraged, if we listen closely, God will speak to us quietly and send us a moment of inspiration and allow us grace and understanding of our life experiences. And after pausing to reflect, I also remembered how at one time what had seemed to be the scariest and most discouraging times I experienced in life, finding out as a senior in High School that I was pregnant , later turned out to be one of my greatest blessings of all time.
Of course as a straight A honor Roll student in the top ten of my graduating class, Beauty pageant Queen, sorority debutante winner, dutiful church member , and with hopes of being a Howard University Freshman, a teen pregnancy didn’t fit into my scope of happiness or even reality. Even the puppy dog love of my high school sweetheart would not allow me to see how the news of pregnancy before marriage, before college, before life as I predicted---was a blessing. I felt lost, ashamed, regretful, discouraged and hopeless. Time, however, and the birth of my first born baby girl did allow me to embrace my blessing.
In both reflections, I realized that with those two life changing experiences and many more that I had experienced, that the passing of time allows healing, understanding, growth, validation, and acceptance which eventually leads to Happiness once again.
In both reflections, I realized that with those two life changing experiences and many more that I had experienced, that the passing of time allows healing, understanding, growth, validation, and acceptance which eventually leads to Happiness once again.
There is a saying that experience is life's best teacher. I truly believe our best lessons are learned when life is the teacher. And most experiences will revisit us again and again so it’s important that we retain key concepts and learn to live through our experiences no matter what we are going through. As a child of God I am allowed to make mistakes, experience disappointments and still be Happy. Even when the circumstances don’t read like a fairy tale, within every year of my life, every week of my life, every day of my life, every hour, I’m allowed to be happy not because of everything that is right but in spite of everything that is wrong.